i think he's beautiful
by komahinas
Summary: There was a boy who caught Ciel's bus, who had blue eyes and laughed a lot, and Ciel thought he was absolutely beautiful. AloisxCiel, Suicide/Mentions of suicide, modern au. Inspired off a picture i saw on tumblr c:


**There was a boy who caught Ciel's bus, and Ciel thought he was beautiful.**

_There is a boy who catches my bus, with bluey-grey eyes as clear as the lake the kids go swimming in. He sits with his friends and laughs a lot at little things. When his friends go quiet, he looks out the window. I sit two seats behind him, and I think he is beautiful. _

Every day, Ciel would sit in the same seat on the bus, at the very back and away from everyone else. Since the first day, there had been one boy who caught his bus, whom he was almost obsessed with. His name was Alois.

Alois was strange, while everyone else chose to wear normal jeans and a shirt, he wore short shorts and dress shirts. He had messy blond hair, and bright blue eyes. Everyone loved him. The girls, and even boys, fawned over him and sent him love letters, but he never seemed interested. He had three best friends, who were his 'brothers'. They were triplets, and everywhere he was, they followed. He'd laugh far too much at the tiniest things, and the triplets would laugh along too.

_There is a boy who catches my bus who acts happy every morning from 7am. He sits with his friends and gives empty smiles and wears long sleeves in the middle of summer. I sit two seats behind him, and I think he is beautiful._

Summer came around, and Ciel was forever confused as to why Alois suddenly changed. He was never as happy, he could tell as the bus rolled up to pick up Alois. The boy always had a sad look on his face, until he got on that bus, and acted as if nothing were wrong. Ciel wondered why he changed, what caused him to. Whatever the reason, though, Ciel still thought he was beautiful.

Alois changed that summer. He'd fallen out of love, hated himself. He changed his usual shorts and dress shirts to plain jeans and long sleeves. He didn't sleep, didn't eat, didn't do anything besides get up, go to school and go home. There may have been one thing keeping him from going insane, if only they'd care, though.

_There is a boy who catches my bus who has bluey-grey eyes as empty as the lake the kids go swimming in, in winter. He sits with his friends and stares at his lap and when his friends say something funny, he doesn't laugh anymore. I sit two seats behind him, and I think he is beautiful. _

Ciel noticed more than anyone the small, subtle changes in the boy two seats in front of him. He noticed how he didn't laugh, or smile, or even talk unless he really had to. He still wore long sleeves and jeans, and would stutter and apologise if one of his sleeves rolled up when he bumped into someone, then run away and hide. He was starting to hurt a little too, seeing someone so beautiful this sad. He wanted the old Alois back, the happy, shorts wearing, dressy, loud and gorgeous boy who caught his bus. No matter, he was stunning either way.

He got worse. He didn't know how to laugh, or smile. He forgot what happy felt like, forgot what it was. He'd often be so lost in his self-loathing and thoughts that he wouldn't see the blue haired boy staring at him, and bump into him, and Alois wouldn't even look up, just say sorry and run away. He never knew who the boy he kept bumping into was, because he never looked. And it was always the one blue haired boy he wanted to see.

_There __**was **__a boy who caught my bus who was found by his parents after he shot himself.__ He wrote a letter to his friends and told them that he loved them. He wrote a letter to his parents saying sorry. And he wrote a letter to the sad boy who sat two seats behind him on the bus, and told him that he was beautiful. _

The news came quick. Ciel had wondered why Alois hadn't got the bus that morning, or even showed up at the bus stop. His friends, brothers, hadn't either. He was worried. And then the awful, awful truth came out in a school assembly that morning. "A tragedy, an awful, horrible tragedy. I'm deeply sorry to announce to you all, that one of our students is no longer with us." Ciel couldn't even listen to the name, he knew who it was. His mind exploded. Alois couldn't be gone, why? No, no no no no NO, someone so beautiful couldn't be gone so quick. Ciel passed out, and woke up in the nurses office. He found out he was invited to the funeral, and showed up looking just as sad as everyone else, and was handed a letter.

The funeral was a few days later, and if Alois had of seen the people there, he might've thought twice about what he did. Almost the entire school showed up. His family had given Ciel a reserved seat at the front, and the boy was utterly confused as to why. The service went on, and Ciel couldn't help but cry. "But you didn't even know him!" People would whisper, but he did. He knew that he was sad, and lonely, and he had lovely eyes, and an amazing laugh and he was absolutely gorgeous. At the end of the funeral, Alois' mother handed Ciel a small letter, folded up and tear stained. She nodded to it, and left him alone. He shakily opened the letter, and his entire world collapsed.

"_Dear Ciel,_

_ I know you don't know me, or care, but I stare at you all the time. You sit two seats behind me on the bus, and you always look very sad. I know why, and honestly I can't blame you. Anyway, I wish I could've gathered up the courage to talk to you. Although you were always alone, I could never bring myself to say hi, or try to start a conversation. And now I'll never get the chance._

_I have only one confession before I end this, I've told the triplets I love them, mum and dad that I'm sorry. Now you. Ciel Phantomhive, I steal glances at you in class, and when I'm hopping on the bus, and in pe when you're changing and I'm sitting out while you run and play games. I look at you, and think about you all the time._

_I'm Alois Trancy, and I think that the boy who sits two seats behind me, is absolutely beautiful. And I think, I might just love him."_

**(****(wow ok, so I saw this picture on tumblr with those quotes on it and it literally made me weep, it just made me so sad and I wanted to write something inspired by it. And also anyone who reads my 'gay roommates' I'm struggling like hell to get ideas, so I'm asking you lovely lil pumpkins ****to send me ideas or requests, and if not for that fic for any kind of fic you want! I'll write any ship, and fandom etc I'll do whatever you like! Hope you all have/had/are having a lovely lovely day and I hope you get a nice big hug today! c:))**


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